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Feeling lonely, bruised, abandoned, ever since your girlfriend or wife walked out on you? Feeling too depressed to actually go hunting in the streets or chat up a colleague for a date? We’ve got just the thing for lazy, desperate bums who are unwilling to lift so much as a little finger for a lady – an inflatable date! Just bang on the packet and give it a good rub and hey presto! the package inflates and out pops the shape of a woman! She’s not going to complain, is not choosy or hyper-sensitive, won’t the nag the miserable cockles out of you, in fact can’t do anything much apart from staying inflated as long as you want it to! And you don’t have to meet the parents, either! She’s very close to being the ideal girl-friend you’ve been looking for all your life. And it costs just a few pounds! What are you waiting for, this could be the love of your life!
Same thing if you are a woman! Cut out all the burping, farting, football obsession! Simply hit the packet to instantly get a masculine date. You could gift this to one of your friends or maybe send it over to some gay icon!